Because of the enormous pain I am carrying around from my last relationship, I seem to be focusing on what is going wrong with my life. And there’s plenty to focus on there, for sure. But there is also the other end of the spectrum. The one that houses things that we don’t pay attention to because they don’t fit our current mood. Like one that I basically tripped over earlier.

So when I moved into my own apartment, I pretty much didn’t have anything but some mattresses and some stuff that has been in storage forever. No sofa, loveseat, coffee table, bed frame, dresser, etc. Not a big deal because I can sleep at least. But I’ve been hunting for the right stuff for me and my apartment. I found a great sofa and loveseat for a good price. I found a dining room buffet (my mom loves to give me dishes) for a great price, etc. And then I found the most amazing dresser. It was a little steep but it was literally perfect. 1960s antique, perfect color. So I coordinated with friends to help me move it and we headed out to a beautiful part of the city I have never seen before. It was a great time, watching my old friends become new friends.

So we get to the seller’s place and I see the dresser and my heart dropped. It was so tiny. It was most certainly not the size it appeared to be in the photos posted. Don’t get me wrong; it was beautiful. But DEFINITELY not worth the asking price and ultimately wouldn’t work for me. I was so disappointed but I had to tell the seller that I couldn’t take it. I am proud of myself though for not just going and buying it because I felt bad about wasting her time. Thanks to my sweet friends to explained again and again that I did not have to do that. 🙂

So we drove home, new friends still chatting away in the front seat, me piping in every now and then but mostly feeling sad that it wasn’t what I wanted. Essentially feeling sorry for myself for not seeming to ever be able to get what I want. Yes, yes, to sum it up in one word – pouting.

So we drop off one friend and then head back to the other friend’s house so I can get my car to go home. But I run inside to say hi to the kids and to my friend’s roommate whose birthday it is. But I hear her on the phone. So I ask my friend what is going on. As it turns out, the roommate, Rachel, is having an unexpected series of medical procedures within the coming week. She is scared about the procedures, of course, but also the cost. She was telling my friend that she wasn’t expecting to have to pay a $150 copay tomorrow. And she was stressed.

Suddenly I realized that there was a reason the dresser deal didn’t work out and it had absolutely nothing with the universe poo-pooing on me.

That money that I had pulled out for “the dresser that wasn’t meant to be” was supposed to go to Rachel. That money wasn’t meant for something to store my socks but rather to tuck away at least some of her stress and anxiety. I asked my friend for a card and envelope and wrote out a poorly worded birthday card and an explanation of the cash.

Hey, I may be the last one catching on to the plans laid out for me by the universe, but I’m still in the game. My job at this moment is to comfort my friend and be on the lookout for the other tiny dressers out there.